Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Alexx Shorts: RoC The Doctor (8/21/09)

Well, this is it: I've finally decided to start reposting my old "Alexx Shorts" G.I. Joe reviews.  They're the reviews that lead to what eventually became this blog!  I'll be posting them in straight copy-and-paste format, separating them with bold dotted lines so you know where they begin and end, and then I'll post some final thoughts on what I think of the figure currently.

For those unfamiliar: I used to take random pictures here and there, but by the time the Rise of Cobra toys came out, I was getting annoying with how much people had been bashing the figures which were clearly better than the previous 25th Anniversary offerings.  I set out to show people how awesome they were, and things went from there, forming into "Alexx Shorts", named so because I thought I was going to keep to a short format with a few pictures.  I did not do that.

This guy was not long awesome, but provided SO much fodder that I had to get more of 'em!


Gotta admit, I was a fan of this figure before I ever saw him in the movie. After the movie, I'm a RABID fan! The Doctor was AWESOME, and this figure is awesome, especially since he comes with some junk that never appears in the movie. I mean, all the stuff that needs to be there is there, so the rest is icing on the cake! 

One thing that stands out right away is the likeness from the film:

The only thing missing is the blue monicle! Otherwise, he's spot on! If for nothing else, this is a fantastic figure for anyone who is a fan of The Doctor. However...there are MANY reasons to get this figure. Oh so many. There are too many uses for just about any part of this figure! On top of that, it really is a great figure! Without the jacket, all his articulation works and his suit is this strappy business that just rocks no matter what head is on it. Here, take a look:

(By the way, the jokes in this review are only gona get worse). So you've got an awesome figure, and like I said, SO many different possibilities present themselves when you fool around with it. Let me get the standard stuff out of the way and show you what The Doctor can do as The Doctor:

You start off with a lovely array of horrifying accessories; from a nano-injector and claws, to a giant clamp thing he probably got from Dr. Mindbender when he was just starting to go crazy creating new dental tools. There's also the case with the nanomites!

Each one of those comes out, and you can probably find all kinds of stuff to fit in that case, so that's a nice multi-purpose accessory right off the bat!

There's also a cool rifle, that sadly keeps with the "too big" trend, so he can't really get it in a realistic position.

As usual, if you're okay with the gun butt being over the shoulder a little, other figures can hold it well. I don't need him to be packing that much heat anyhow. He's The Doctor! He's got other folks to do the dirty work.

Of course, if he does have to do some dirty work, there's always those freaky claws that never appear in the movie:

And if you want to go really overboard and totally awesome with it, add those funky gauntlets from Arctic Assault Storm Shadow for some Terror Claw time!

In terms of crazy and weird, though, you gotta consider the giant clamp-thing that replaces the standard missile launcher:

Just push the green back part, and the clamp opens and closes! Sadly, the clamp arms don't really close all that tight, and they sometimes end up sticking out until you push them back in. If you can't find any use for it at all, then flip 'er upside down for some sorta machine:

Okay, times up for that standard stuff! Now, "Alexx!" you shout, "What else can we do with the good Doctor?" A fine question, folks, and what luck: I just so happened to do a little swapping! Number one: He comes with hair in a line that has quite a few bald guys from the 25ths. Number two: The body is so simple and awesome that the custom possibilities are endless. Though.....if you're a Metal Gear fan, you probably already thought of this one right away:

Only thing he's missing is the bare shoulders! I'm totally buying another to have my own Psycho Mantis. (look here if you're confused). Next, however, is something I'm sure not many of you thought of....which doesn't say good things about me, honestly:

Add Flash's head, and you've got an instant gimp! Croc Master's croc chain just adds that little cherry on top!

AH HAHAHAHAHA! Oh, that Baroness and her tight leather obsessions. Will she ever learn to take care of those gimps? Remember to feed those poor things!

Enough wackiness, though. What can we do with what's there, and with the Cobra Commander figure? Well, for starters:

Just in case you were curious. Also:

I was really hoping the hair would fit right, but it doesn't look very good at all, so I didn't bother with a pic. But hey, what about the head that he comes with?

Alright, alright! Just kidding.

Here's an interesting look. Even better, though, is using the black Destro head with the red eyes, from the comic pack. I threw on Overkill's helmet to complete the look:

Cool, huh? I was thinking that made a pretty awesome Overkill! At least, to begin with. From the head down is up for grabs!

Finally, since they gave me some freakin' hair, I couldn't resist. Cue the Benny Hill song!

Alright, so maybe that wasn't wacky enough for that song. Anyway, there are so many reasons to get this figure that I can't say much else other than "Must Buy." He's awesome on so many levels! Grab this when you find it!


I honestly had to dig this guy out to see if I kept him together.  Pretty sure I bought one or two extras for parts!  They've been spread to the four winds, so I'd have to dig out multiple customs to see where I used all the parts.  Basic thing is that he's still cool as-is or as parts.  The body is still useful for so many things!  It was pretty unique among Joes.  The hair, too!  Ah heck: Everything I said in the old review still counts!  All of it!  I was excited to get 'em back then, and if I was still as into Joes as I was then, I'd STILL be excited for this guy. 

There's a ton to do with him, and if you're still into customizing using found parts, I'd get 'em.  Not a bad figure to keep for a scientist, either (especially since they repainted him later with a white lab coat instead of black). 


  1. This is a figure that screams 'ignore the fiction, just enjoy the toy'! Mad Doctor is such an easy stereotype to build a character off!

    Also his spiked gloves remind me if Scarecrow from the Arkham games. Wouldn't be the first time G.I.Joe has thrown out a good homage!

    1. Yeah this guy just seemed like a bundle of homages! If I could say something was missing, it would be the monocle from the movie, but like you said: WHO CARES. This figure is so awesome, and I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of people had multiples of this figure.

  2. Another one that I love a lot. Sure, he makes more sense as movieverse Mindbender than being Cobra Commander, but, hey, they fixed him well enough in the sequel.

    (Still weird that it's JLGL under the makeup, though, isn't it?)

    Heh, I need to do that Psycho Mantis thing. Especially since I just FINALLY finished off my Snake custom (do you know freaking HARD it is to find people willing to part with Jungle Dukes?)

    1. Right, the movies had some interesting ideas that I was sorta willing to follow, but they did so terribly that it all went down the drain anyway. And yeah having JLGL play him was....well, actually, the best part! He played the Doctor SO WELL, and was probably by favorite part of the film. Kinda like how Frank Langella as Skeletor was the best thing about the old He-Man film.

      And man, I am not surprised Jungle Duke is hard to come by. Not at all. Just...a STAND OUT figure amongst even the strong offerings from most of Pursuit of Cobra. I'm still sorta surprised I didn't buy a second one of him.

    2. I would lay good money that about 30% of the Jungle Duke figures in existence have seen their heads sacrificed for Solid Snake / Naked Snake customs. That bandana's just too obvious not to re-use.

      And, yeah, he's a great figure besides that. They keep re-using the webgear (Stalker, that recent Dusty... who lasted about three seconds with me before being turned into Muskrat) and the underlying body is aces.

  3. I don't think I ever found a Black coated version, just the White coat and arms, which I got a few because as you so wonderfully illustrate he's a fantastic figure with so many uses.

    Mine was COBRA SCIENCE NERDS with a simple headswap.

    1. Yeah, you can't go wrong with the white coat version! And like you said: The Cobra Science Nerds are SO easy to make! Especially since the 25th series made some goofy head sculpts that work perfectly as nerds (like Breaker's I'm-in-the-middle-of-chewing-gum headsculpt).

  4. "Sir, we finally found the Doctor's secret evil warehouse where he keeps his evil wares!"

    "What evil wares did you confiscate?"

    "That's just it...it was all Combos...NOTHIN' BUT COMBOS!"

    Anyhow I had this figure and I also bought it entirely for use of the body parts. I gave him Cobra Island Mindbender's cape and head, creating a pretty great 21st century Mindbender. He went into the sale bin earlier this year, though, and I had to finally separate them back into their original parts.

    1. COMBOS JOOOOOOKES!! You know the way to my heart, you charmer you.

      Anyway, that's one of the things I'm not looking forward to when it comes time to sell things. ALL the accessories are in little separated drawers (like a thing made to hold screws 'n nails and manly stuff, instead of toys) so I'll have to look up each and every figures to find out what they had originally come with and DIG IT ALL OUT AHHH.

    2. This is going to sound morbid, but I actually have a little note written out for my wife in one of my Joe storage boxes on what to do if she ever has to sell everything without me, y'know... around.

      (One of the lines may or may not be "Contact this Alexx guy, he might be a good resource.")

      I'm actually mostly okay in that I think the rarest figure I've got is, like, Lifeline, and he's safely in a baggie. Really, the problem would be trying to place a value on my fumbling attempts at customs.