Tuesday, December 6, 2016

Alexx Shorts: RoC Red Fang Ninja (10/26/09)


Well, this is it: I've finally decided to start reposting my old "Alexx Shorts" G.I. Joe reviews.  They're the reviews that lead to what eventually became this blog!  I'll be posting them in straight copy-and-paste format, separating them with bold dotted lines so you know where they begin and end, and then I'll post some final thoughts on what I think of the figure currently.

For those unfamiliar: I used to take random pictures here and there, but by the time the Rise of Cobra toys came out, I was getting annoying with how much people had been bashing the figures which were clearly better than the previous 25th Anniversary offerings.  I set out to show people how awesome they were, and things went from there, forming into "Alexx Shorts", named so because I thought I was going to keep to a short format with a few pictures.  I did not do that.


GO NINJA GO NINJA GO:
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If you read my reviews regularly, you'd think I'd be happy to buy any figure in this scale and call it a day. You'd mostly be right! I'm also a big fan of reusing parts and repainting, so long as it looks like some thought was put into it. Granted, I can't that thought wasn't put into this one, but once I got it in my hands, I can say that it just doesn't feel like the idea was gotten across very well.

The first problem, I think, is the head. The buzz cut and goggles says X-TREEM SNOWBOARDING to me, and not ninja. Right then and there, it gives me the impression that this guy says he's a ninja, but in reality, he just really loves ninjas. I mean, A LOT. My photos will reflect this. 

So lets get to it:  First, I told ya I didn't like the look of the head with the goggles. Next, the accessories don't really try very hard to bring it home.


I already didn't like the...whatever that launcher is, that came with Storm Shadow originally. Storm Shadow, though, is freakin' cool and can over "shadow" (yukyukyuk) the horrible thing. This guy isn't so lucky, since they decided to add an extra giant frisbee rather than another cool weapon. Thanks.






Beyond that, though, lets take a look at the stuff that'll actually matter to you!


Here's your basic figure, sans stuff. It's actually kinda cool like that, and adding any sort of gear will get you something neat. He's even got Cobra symbols on each shoulder:


Adding the stuff he comes with, though, creates RoC's excuse for the Red Ninja clan.



In this state, I just can't take him seriously. He looks like a D-Bag ninja! If they wanted to throw together a RoC Red Ninja, I wouldn't have minded the tech angle (even though Night Creepers cover that) but for some reason, this stuff together just makes him look funny and completely non-threatening.






I can't tell ya to skip this guy, though. You can never have enough of those goggles, and the swords are good 'n standard. The base body is even pretty cool! The ninja harness was always kinda funny (somehow only Storm Shadow can pull it off) but it has plenty of good stuff on it to be cut apart and used for different things. The only mostly useless thing is the launcher and discs, but even those can be used with an imagination and some tools. 

So, in the end, I guess I'm trying to say that this is great fodder! Nonetheless, I can see this guy being a bit more serious in the eyes of others. Bet you were surprised that I wasn't enamored with this one, eh? I do like my ninjas, but somehow this one just doesn't hit the same mark for me. 


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Wow, Past Alexx kinda tore this guy apart!  Figuratively and literally, since I don't even know where all his parts went.  I think his head is even covered by a mask on some other figure, so not even that is recognizable. 

Funny thing is: I don't fully agree, anymore!  I can see what I was getting at, but looking at it now...I kinda like it!  I don't regret using his parts, but he's nowhere near as bad as a "D-Bag ninja" as I had thought back then (though I'm glad I did think that, because I love this guy's character).  I have no idea what has changed between then and now to make me look at him in a better light.  I wouldn't say he's worth hunting down, but he still looks a lot cooler to me now than he did back then.

I will agree with on thing, though: He was a terrible rendition of the Red Ninja Clan guys.  At least, that's what he was supposed to be, for Rise of Cobra.  Not a bad singular ninja, but way too basic for the Red Ninjas (which is funny, considering they're just....red ninjas). 

Does anyone love this one enough to keep it around as-is?


17 comments:

  1. Any I had got turned into parts, especially the Cobra trooper head for some skin tone diversity.

    The goggles went to my Cobra SCIENCE figure box, for when science needs to be done while wearing red goggles.

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    1. It's gona be a challenge to find someone who didn't cannibalize this guy!

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  2. Giant gun that shoots shurikens the size of manhole covers.

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    1. Giving the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles a run for their money, on the manhole-cover-slinging business.

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  3. Oh yeah, I remember when this guy was the first boss of that Rise of Cobra beat-em-up, and then he comes back as a regular enemy in the later stages. I always hated that rolling slash move he would do.

    ...no? That's not a real game? Dang.

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    1. OH MAN, that couldn't have been more spot-on. If this figure were still together, I'd have to make a comic about that.

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    2. While I was typing that up it occurred to me that the Accelerator Suits would make for excellent beat-em-up player characters. You could have Duke/Ripcord and Snake Eyes and you'd be golden. It would be like the Punisher arcade game. You fight through waves of Neo Vipers while the Eiffel Tower slowly dissolves in the background. It would be better than the movie!

      Damn it! I wish they were still making games like that.

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    3. Of all the nostalgia driven stuff out there, I'm surprised this hasn't come back more often. They've remade a few TMNT ones, but...well, it wasn't quite the same as the originals.

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    4. The Scott Pilgrim game was aces. You even get beat up by a TTC bus... which is sadly accurate for Toronto traffic these days.

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    5. Scott Pilgrim was super awesome, yeah. There have been a few other homages to the genre like Double Dragon Neon and Castle Crashers.

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  4. Would that harness look good as a skeletor harness?

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    1. Hmm...as it is, I wouldn't use it. I think it could work with some customization work, but the belt has way too many modern looking pockets around it. Plus there's the weird things hanging around the side of the chest. Those might be an interesting flourish, though, if you just cut the center part off that holds the belt on. Discard the belt and center part and you might have something once you do some work on the shoulder pads.

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  5. I kinda like him. I even make a custom modern era Razorclaw to be their leader.

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    1. I think he pulled off the "high tech ninja" look far better than the Night Creeper. Padded combat fatigues with a pouched belt, and a ninja-y harness and swords. Plus the protective goggles. Really all they're missing are a submachine gun or two.
      http://i163.photobucket.com/albums/t285/Detour84/Joe/JinxRedFang.jpg

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    2. Yeah, like I was sayin' in my afterthoughts: I like him a lot better than I did, back then. The review ended up funny, but my views have changed, I guess! Of course, I don't know where his parts ended up, so I doubt I can get him back together.

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    3. I did laugh at the skit, yes.
      I also feel maybe the "tech-ninja" effect would've been better using the ROC Elite-Viper body rather than the bulkier Neo-Viper... but I can look past those flaws and enjoy the figure regardless.
      Comically enough when they tried the tech-ninja again with the Retaliation Cyber-Ninja, they DID go with Elite-Viper parts.... and ruined it with the bulky Crimson Horseman helmet.

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    4. Aw, I actually loved the use of that helmet! Granted, that sweet mono-eye head from the Cobra Ninja Trooper would have been better, but something about the Cyber-Ninja really worked for me. Definitely one of my favorites from that line.

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